encouraging friends

I know yesterday I rambled a little, and I apologize for that, but the entire concept of who we associate with and who we spend time with is so crucial to our well being, yet it is the one area that we often over look. We always cut out friends slack but is it at the cost of our own well being? Are the people that we are feeding feeding us? Are we encouraging each other?? I know what is the deal with me always talking about encouraging each other? Why is that so important?

Well let me put it this way, maybe you will see why I dwell on it so much.

Dante Gabriel Rossetti, the famous 19th-century poet and artist, was once approached by an elderly man. The old fellow had some sketches and drawings that he wanted Rossetti to look at and tell him if they were any good, or if they at least showed potential talent.
Rossetti looked them over carefully. After the first few, he knew that they were worthless, showing not the least sign of artistic talent. But Rossetti was a kind man, and he told the elderly man as gently as possible that the pictures were without much value and showed little talent. He was sorry, but he could not lie to the man.
The visitor was disappointed, but seemed to expect Rosette’s judgment. He then apologized for taking up Rossetti’s time, but would he just look at a few more drawings - these done by a young art student?
Rossetti looked over the second batch of sketches and immediately became enthusiastic over the talent they revealed. "These," he said, "oh, these are good. This young student has great talent. He should be given every help and encouragement in his career as an artist. He has a great future if he will work hard and stick to it."
Rossetti could see that the old fellow was deeply moved. "Who is this fine young artist?" he asked. "Your son?"
"No," said the old man sadly. "It is me - 40 years ago. If only I had heard your praise then! For you see, I got discouraged and gave up - too soon."

You see we are all painters, God gives us each a blank canvas how well we paint that picture is going to depend on the feedback we get while painting it. Imagine that the people that come in to your life while you are painting are always telling you that it is good, but not good enough, or that while it is OK it will never be a masterpiece. Better yet, they really don’t care about your painting at all, they just want you to set your brush down and come help with their painting! Sound familiar? I am sure it does! These are the people that we have to stay away form; our picture we are painting is our life’s masterpiece. It is great to lend advice and encouragement to other painters, but you cannot paint their picture for them, you have your own work to do!

So then what is a friend? My daughter sent me thins and honestly is what started me down this road this week.
One day, when I was a freshman in high school, I saw a kid from my class was walking home from school.His name was Kyle.It looked like he was carrying all of his books..I thought to myself, 'Why would anyone bring home all his books on a Friday?He must really be a nerd.'I had quite a weekend planned (parties and a football game with my friends tomorrow afternoon), so I shrugged my shoulders and went on.As I was walking, I saw a bunch of kids running toward him..They ran at him, knocking all his books out of his arms and tripping him so he landed in the dirt.His glasses went flying, and I saw them land in the grass about ten feet from him.He looked up and I saw this terrible sadness in his eyes.My heart went out to him. So, I jogged over to him as he crawled around looking for his glasses, and I saw a tear in his eye.As I handed him his glasses, I said, 'Those guys are jerks. They really should get lives.'He looked at me and said, 'Hey, thanks!'There was a big smile on his face.It was one of those smiles that showed real gratitude.I helped him pick up his books, and asked him where he lived.As it turned out, he lived near me, so I asked him why I had never seen him before. He said he had gone to private school before now.I would have never hung out with a private school kid before.We talked all the way home, and I carried some of his books.He turned out to be a pretty cool kid.I asked him if he wanted to play a little football with my friendsHe said yes...We hung out all weekend and the more I got to know Kyle, the more I liked him, and my friends thought the same of him.Monday morning came, and there was Kyle with the huge stack of books again..I stopped him and said, 'Boy, you are gonna really build some serious muscles with this pile of books everyday!'He just laughed and handed me half the books.Over the next four years, Kyle and I became best friends.. When we were seniors we began to think about college.Kyle decided on Georgetown and I was going to Duke.I knew that we would always be friends, that the miles would never be a problem.He was going to be a doctor and I w as going for business on a football scholarship.Kyle was valedictorian of our class.I teased him all the time about being a nerd.He had to prepare a speech for graduation.I was so glad it wasn't me having to get up there and speak.Graduation day, I saw Kyle. He looked great.He was one of those guys that really found himself during high school. He filled out and actually looked good in glasses. He had more dates than I had and all the girls loved him.Boy, sometimes I was jealous! Today was one of those days.I could see that he was nervous about his speech. So, I smacked him on the back and said, 'Hey, big guy, you'll be great!'He looked at me with one of those looks (the really grateful one) and smiled.' Thanks,' he said..As he started his speech, he cleared his throat, and began'Graduation is a time to thank those who helped you make it through those tough years.Your parents, your teachers, your siblings, maybe a coach...but mostly your friends...I am here to tell all of you that being a friend to someone is the best gift you can give them.I am going to tell you a story..'I just looked at my friend with disbelief as he told the story of the first day we met.He had planned to kill himself over the weekend.He talked of how he had cleaned out his locker so his Mom wouldn't have to do it later and was carrying his stuff home.He looked hard at me and gave me a little smile.'Thankfully, I was saved. My friend saved me from doing the unspeakable.'I heard the gasp go through the crowd as this handsome, popular boy told us all about his weakest moment.I saw his Mom and dad looking at me and smiling that same grateful smile..Not until that moment did I realize it's depth.

This is true friendship. Someone went out and accepted another person. No expectations, no pre-requisites, just an offer of friendship that ended up turning into much more. This is why encouragement is so important. This is why if you find yourself surrounded by people who are spending more time tearing you down than helping you out, you need to really make some hard choices.

No ones circle of friends will be perfect, we all have our problems, and no one is perfect. Even Christ had issues with the Apostles. They argued over who was the best best friend, they missed the points He was trying to make sometimes, some of them doubted Him, some of them denied Him, and one even betrayed Him.

If the people that hung out with Christ were less than perfect and made mistakes, you can bet that we are going to have the same problems, if not more of them form the people that spend time with us, you can be assured that you will make mistakes as well. Making mistakes is nothing new to us humans; it is how we respond that counts. Do we continue to make the same offences against the people in our lives, do we allow the same people to continue to use us like a doormat? Remember that we all want to be like Christ, it is the one thing that we all can agree on; however don’t forget to be ready to leave. We can only do so much, and try for so long before we are no longer helping others, but we are in fact destroying ourselves!

Peace,
Brian